You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
