I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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