everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
