you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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