Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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