he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
