i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize