She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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