he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
