yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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