I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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