Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
