I need to stop coming to work sober
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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