I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
