Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
there is glitter all over my balls
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize