giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
