we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize