that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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