brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
So many bounce houses so little time
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
