wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize