Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
