i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I still have a little drunk in my system
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize