ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My dick has a subreddit
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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