i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
