He is like the real live version of the state fair..
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
