I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
