I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I forget how to act sober
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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