You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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