Texts From Last Night

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  (301): View more from Maryland

  and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit

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  (301): and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit http://tfl.nu/fjd7
  Replies (8) Good night (4593) Bad night (1085)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?

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  (610): I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show? http://tfl.nu/56pk
  Replies (28) Good night (4257) Bad night (2326)
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  (01): View more from

  He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.

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  (01): He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates. http://tfl.nu/mdzx
  Replies (6) Good night (2936) Bad night (957)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.

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  (540): Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them. http://tfl.nu/zz58
  Replies (7) Good night (1111) Bad night (2221)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13

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  (781): after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13 http://tfl.nu/mex2
  Replies (7) Good night (1385) Bad night (2624)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.

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  (763): The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins. http://tfl.nu/k74l
  Replies (8) Good night (2691) Bad night (923)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?

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  (202): you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday? http://tfl.nu/psur
  Replies (6) Good night (3535) Bad night (1158)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.

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  (440): Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved. http://tfl.nu/v30q
  Replies (3) Good night (1799) Bad night (627)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success

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  (413): This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame (774): I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success http://tfl.nu/49mo
  Replies (6) Good night (1788) Bad night (729)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?

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  (517): Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's? http://tfl.nu/t57e
  Replies (6) Good night (779) Bad night (394)
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  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.

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  (339): You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once. (781): I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian. http://tfl.nu/l29g
  Replies (4) Good night (1096) Bad night (354)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.

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  (817): she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other. http://tfl.nu/sl8d
  Replies (7) Good night (1090) Bad night (395)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.

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  (440): I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house. http://tfl.nu/ronf
  Replies (3) Good night (797) Bad night (430)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.

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  (518): Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong. http://tfl.nu/bkiv
  Replies (2) Good night (585) Bad night (203)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...

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  (631): Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy... http://tfl.nu/m1es
  Replies (1) Good night (302) Bad night (207)

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