Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg

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  (612): Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg http://tfl.nu/5ras
  Replies (19) Good night (810) Bad night (3762)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today

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  (847): I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today http://tfl.nu/iq2n
  Replies (5) Good night (3088) Bad night (556)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom

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  (423): If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom http://tfl.nu/66s8
  Replies (32) Good night (1623) Bad night (4739)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.

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  (512): My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context. http://tfl.nu/nfjx
  Replies (26) Good night (6164) Bad night (1028)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.

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  (401): my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie. http://tfl.nu/a7k2
  Replies (13) Good night (734) Bad night (3488)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.

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  (250): I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown. http://tfl.nu/tv3d
  Replies (40) Good night (7346) Bad night (1063)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.

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  (313): Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck. http://tfl.nu/ib4p
  Replies (4) Good night (2069) Bad night (1433)
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  (631): View more from New York

  I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.

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  (631): I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis. http://tfl.nu/wmkv
  Replies (5) Good night (1682) Bad night (465)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized

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  (217): Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized http://tfl.nu/ymju
  Replies (7) Good night (1878) Bad night (743)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?

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  (773): by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go? http://tfl.nu/xzhw
  Replies (3) Good night (1038) Bad night (487)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.

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  (608): Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe. http://tfl.nu/0d36
  Replies (4) Good night (321) Bad night (623)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.

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  (520): I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now. http://tfl.nu/zshk
  Replies (8) Good night (790) Bad night (352)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  this st patricks day sucks

  (815): View more from Illinois

  ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles

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  (630): this st patricks day sucks (815): ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles http://tfl.nu/aosd
  Replies (1) Good night (492) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it

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  (507): Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it http://tfl.nu/9eeg
  Replies (0) Good night (534) Bad night (203)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back

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  (860): Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back http://tfl.nu/64sk
  Replies (7) Good night (323) Bad night (894)

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