he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.