Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.

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(913): View more from Kansas

omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand

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(914): View more from New York

i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(519): View more from Ontario

I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.

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(775): View more from Nevada

Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"

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(513): View more from Ohio

Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now

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(602): View more from Arizona

he bit THROUGH my nipple

(480): View more from Arizona

plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.

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