You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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