my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
being pregnant is like rehab
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes