Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
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I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
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One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.