It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Holy sore nipples Batman
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
