I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize