I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
