I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
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She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
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The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?