So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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