VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
