im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
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Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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