Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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