I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
