My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
She told me I should be a condom model.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
