Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
