please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The air was thick with penises
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
