I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
