why didn't you poke me back
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
only if we run a train.
done.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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