Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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