I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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