somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
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i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
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He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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