I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
