i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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