Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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