I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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